Survival of the Not Quite Fittest


I’ve been trying not to slip into a mindless panic. In part this is because of the daily onslaught of fresh horrors from the new administration. In part it is a combination of medication side effects, illness complications, and parenting two intense little humans during emotionally fraught times…not to mention the standard issue chronic illness and disability complication of never ending financial stress.

So I have been trying to stay somewhat calm and centered…with mixed…at best, results. Still even with so much of the same pressure bearing down on me,  It is, I think, important for me to continue documenting this time, and my feelings in it.

So yes I am scared, I am waiting to see how far this other shoe will drop still, how badly me and mine will be crushed on the way down…whom we can help get out from under it before it drops.

I am practicing as much and as varied self care as I can

hot baths

writing about my feelings

educating people as well as I can on intersectional issues of oppression and equality

knitting when I am able

comfort food

more comfort food


Still the well of the unknown looms over me

cold and menacing

I never have done well with lack of surety

even having seen this coming, more or less

I am unsure how large all of our society’s evils, which have always been there, will grow in such an openly fertile and supportive environment

I am unsure how long this conservative cultural shift will last

what impact it will have on my beloved children

what my place will be in the fight for my family’s right to exist

I only know that I will have one

I must have one


We all must

We looked away to long

accepted resigned sighs and “good enough”

We can not afford to look away any longer

We must look into the abyss and we must name it, “Us”

We must strip the rot from our own hearts

before we can save each other

or ourselves

We must burn with a sacred fire

those of us who can

so that we may survive

so that we may resist

So that we may breathe


Keep Breathing my loves


One thought on “Survival of the Not Quite Fittest

  1. Just keep going, surely a civilized country is not going to put up with this barbarism for long. I’m trying to send good thoughts to you. We had an idiot as leader for awhile (Australia) and his own party got rid of him.

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